A brief Step into the World of Single Parenting

On February 14th, Jake and I got onto different planes, at different airports, headed for different destinations. Little Jakey and I were headed to Florida to visit my family while Jake was off to Texas to start his BASIC MILITARY TRAINING. As we said goodbye, Jakey was screaming, Jake had tears running down his face and my entire face had gone splotchy and red. Two weeks proceeding this event, I had been on an emotional roller coaster, every moment filled with dread. As I carried Jakey back to the car after kissing Jake for the last time for two months, I kept telling myself "People do this all the time. I'm just as good as those people. I can be strong. I can do this... by myself?" GULP. On the airplane I made a pact with myself, I was not going to be miserable for two months. I just wasn't going to allow myself to do that. And you know what? I survived. Sure, I only got to talk to Jake once a week for 15 minutes. On the positive side Jake and I did something that has gone out of style in our technologically advanced world... we exchanged hand-written love letters. In many ways, the separation bonded us, made us grow closer. Most importantly though, it gave us both a stronger appreciation for one another. For two months, I was a single mother. Or I guess I should say, I had to walk in a single mother's shoes. I couldn't counsel with my husband and ask him his opinions. There was no strong arms around me at the end of the day assuring me that I'm a good mother.  (Granted I was living with my parents and was surrounded by wonderful people that I loved all day long. I feel so blessed that I was able to be with them). For two months I pretended to be tough and do you know what I found out about myself? I actually am kind of tough. I learned so much about myself those two months while Jake was away but may I also just say I AM SO HAPPY TO HAVE HIM BACK!

Christmas..in May?

In case you are wondering, I do in fact, know that it is now May but I couldn't resist posting this picture. When Jacob was seven months old, he could say three words...Mama, Dada, and BALL. This picture is my son in a nutshell..shirt untucked, sleeves cuffs unbuttoned, hair stuck to his sweaty forehead and a ball in his hands. As many of you know, I do NOT play sports. Mostly because all through my adolescent years I was a too tall, bean pole. But trying to be a good Mommy, I have stepped out of my comfort zone and tried to be more athletic for Jacob. We spend our days running around the neighborhood, learning important skills like how to kick, dribble and throw a ball. I am proud to say that my own skills have improved. It just reminds me of how much being a mother has changed me and has made me a better person.

 I once read that if the question "Am I a good Mother?" keeps you up at night, then you are one. That statement gives me a lot of hope. It is sometimes overwhelming to know that you are molding a future for a little life by the small and simple things you do. For me, right now, the small and simple things are walking down the street hand in hand with my son, looking for an adventure or reading his favorite book over and over and over again, or even just singing that extra lullaby before bedtime.

Time Out for Women

Last weekend I went to time out for women with my mom, sisters, aunts, cousins, and friends. Time out for women is a women's conference organized by my church.They have music and inspirational speakers. It was so fun! We laughed, we cried, we ate. Hilary Weeks was there. She was so amazing. She didn't perform this song last weekend but I saw her perform it a couple of years ago and it is still my favorite. 

It was such a great weekend! 

Visitors for Thanksgiving

Several of Jake's siblings and their families came into town for Thanksgiving! It was so fun to see everyone. We had such a good time. Here is Elisabeth and Jacob taking a bath. I got to spend a lot of time with Elisabeth this trip and let me just say that I absolutely LOVE her. Who couldn't be charmed by those big brown eyes and full cheeks?

We went into the city one morning to go up the Hancock Observatory and eat real Chicago deep dish pizza. 

The Gillespies have a really fun tradition for Christmas where everyone wears matching pajamas to bed on Christmas Eve. This year we continued the tradition on Thanksgiving. The kids were so excited about their new jammies. 

These are most of the Gillespie Grand-kids (minus 6) These cuties rang from the ages of 3 months to 8 years old.

I am so grateful for my family. I really missed my Ambs family this Thanksgiving and I hope to see them soon but I loved being with the Gillespies. Even though I'm still one of the newest editions to the family everyone has really taken me under their wing and I love each one of them. This week I especially loved snuggling and and playing with my nieces and nephews, going on walks, seeing vampire movies, watching BBC mini series and eating lots of treats with my sister-in-laws, and going to the Chicago Temple with Jake's brothers and their wives.

A little Duckie Halloween!

Here's our little Duckie on Halloween. I tried to teach Jacob how to say trick-or-treat but it was gibberish to everyone except Big Jake and I. We also practiced trick-or-treating so he actually did really well. 

This year we went to the Church and did the Trunk-or-Treat and then on Halloween night we went around the neighbor and did a little Trick-or-Treating.

Happy Halloween!